The Privilege to Serve...

Today was a difficult, exhausting, emotional and all around hard day for me.

Coincidentally, today was also a beautiful, heartwarming, perfect and appropriate day for me and my family.

This morning we were all up bright and early in order to be at the Gift of Life Family House at 8am.  We continued our tradition, which started last year, to serve the guests of the Family House a meal as a way to celebrate Gavin's birthday.  The guests of the Family House are either organ transplant patients from all over the world who are getting treatment at a nearby hospital... or they are families and caregivers of patients who are inpatient at a local hospital.

To make a long story short - we were celebrating our greatest gift of life, Gavin, while simultaneously celebrating THE gift of life - organ donation - and supporting those that have been touched by the need for a transplant.

Last year when we did this, I was six months pregnant with Hope.  To go back a year later with her in our arms was definitely a full circle moment.

Strangely, this year was much harder for me.  They say the second year is tougher than the first when you lose a loved one.  I can say now that this is true - at least for me.  But today was extra hard on my heart because it was also what might have been Darcy's 4th birthday.

It didn't help that I've been beating myself up quite a bit about my May blog post saying Darcy would have been 4 then.  I screwed up.  We call May 10th "Darcy's Day" because it's the day I delivered her.  It wouldn't have technically been her "birthday" if she had lived.  Neither would September 21st, but today was her actual "due date."  I generally have my babies a month early or so - but because nothing worked out as we expected or planned, September 21st is all I have to go on.

Every May 10th - and every September 21st - has been hard for me, but something changed once Hope was born.  Now I understand what it means...what it feels like to have a daughter.  Now I know what I was missing over these last four years.  Suddenly it hurts more as I wonder what Darcy might have been like - and what life would have brought us with her in our family.

But seriously - I did a whole blog post about how she would have been 4 and we would have celebrated her birthday in May - when it's really September.  Who does that?  Apparently, me.

So, anyway... there was that.  On top of Gavin's birthday.  On top of lots of other stuff.  What I'm trying to say with too many words?  It was a tough day.

Yet, I will tell you one thing.  I can't think of a more appropriate way to celebrate our little boy's life than to serve those who are hoping and praying for and often receiving another chance at life.  It was a privilege to be there...and a privilege to serve them.

We're so grateful, once again, to Claire from HomeCooked in Paoli for not only donating the main meal...but for bringing it so we can all help assemble or drizzle or wash.

She even included Brian who, as it turns out, is an expert scone placer.

We were a pretty awesome "Team Super G!"

Thanks to donations from all of you to the Family House, they gave us a paver that we could have inscribed.  It was placed just a few days ago and we were excited to see it.  The folks at the Family House knew that Gavin loved water...and that blue was his color...so they placed it right in front of a beautiful blue fountain in the courtyard - surrounded by hydrangeas.  It's the perfect spot.

It took me months to pick up the paper they sent me for the inscription.  I wanted it to be perfect.  But one day I finally realized that nothing ever is and I just wrote it.

I'm not sure what it all means to Brian in this stage of his life.  But I hope as he grows and grows and becomes an adult... he will come back to this house and know that his brother's life changed people.  Inspired people.  And he was a big part of that.

As my sister, Bean, held Hope and watched her fall asleep to the sounds of that trickling, blue fountain - she told me something that reminded me what today is all about.  She told me that the triplets, her two daughters and son - Shannon, Brendan and Claire - recently became organ donors when they got their driving permits.  I am so, very proud of their selfless and mature decision.  

Gavin's actual birthday is September 29th.  If you would like to support our family through yet another difficult anniversary, I have a GREAT suggestion...

If you aren't an organ donor... please register.  If you're in America, you can click HERE.  Outside of America, google where you can register in your area.

If you have a concern about organ donation - questions like "Will it wreck my appearance if my family would want an open casket?"  or "Is it against my religion?"  or "Am I eligible because of xyz?" - you can find those answers and many other answers to questions you didn't even know you had on the Donate Life website.

If you're already a donor, you can create one post on social media encouraging others to do the same.  You're welcome to use Gavin's story if you want!

If you live in the Philadelphia area, consider volunteering with a group as  "Home Cook Heros!"  It's actually really fun - and greatly rewarding - to make a meal for the guests in the house.  And you'll be able to see Gavin's paver...and his plaque in the entry way... and even the guest room that is dedicated to him.

You could also have a "Wish List Drive" to support the Family House - as they run the house completely on donations.  The last thing a transplant patient - or their caregiver - needs to worry about is running out of toilet paper... or coffee... or any of the items we take for granted on a daily basis.  They can concentrate on health while others stock the kitchen pantry or refrigerators.

If you do any of these things as a way to celebrate Gavin's birthday, please let me know about it.  You can comment here on the blog... or post it on the Chasing Rainbows Facebook Page.

Thank you, as always, for caring about our little family.

Superhero Gavin off to save lives... even still.  

But the first lives he saved...were ours.

He Was Our Greatest Gift Of Life...

Today was a very special day.

Very, very special.

We honored Gavin during his birthday month by helping organ donor recipients and their families at the Gift of Life Family House in Philadelphia.  I have written about the Family House several times and Ed, Brian and I went there in June for a tour and to choose a guest room to be dedicated to Gavin.  You can read about that HERE.

But today we were going there to be "Home Cook Heroes" and to deliver a car load filled with items from the "Wish List Drive" I held in my neighborhood this month.

Thanks to my wonderful Sunwood Farm neighbors for dropping off items for the Family House pantry, laundry room, kitchen and more to our home over this month.  We also received gift cards and donations totaling over $1,175!  My Mom, my sister, Bean and her family, Miss Sara and her parents also contributed to the drive and we were so grateful to deliver so many items in honor of Gavin's birthday.

When we first walked in, we were greeted by Gavin's plaque on their entry way wall.  Thanks to the enormous amount of donations that came in from our "In Lieu Of Flowers" request before Gavin's funeral... and the extremely generous donations from Ed's friends and former co-workers at Accenture, we were able to write our own plaque as a permanent dedication to our sweet boy.  It took our breath away to see it there.

Ed and I are so, so grateful to a local business owner, Claire Guarino, who runs (the most brilliant business idea ever) Home Cooked in Paoli, PA.  Claire came with her husband, Paul, and their little boy, Ian!

Home Cooked is where you can purchase already prepared home cooked meals - you can order ahead with any specifications you want (gluten free - I don't like garlic - I have allergies, etc.) and stock your freezer with meals for the month.  It's a great gift for newlyweds, new parents, or your older parents who are impossible to buy Christmas presents for.  (My family did that for my parents and it was a huge hit one year!!)  We purchased a weeks worth of pre-made meals when we went to the beach for a week.  It was great to not have to go to the grocery store at the shore - or spend a ton of money going out to eat several times.  You can also pop into Home Cooked on a whim and choose from their "grab and go" case.  I've heard that some women throw away their "Home Cooked" containers and receipts and never tell their husband that they didn't make dinner.  I've never done that.  Trust me.  Ed would NEVER believe me.  If you live in my area, definitely visit Home Cooked - and tell Claire that Gavin sent you!  Or, if you know someone who lives near me - you could purchase a gift card for them over the phone!  (Can you tell I love this business??)  

Thanks so much to Claire for generously donating and prepping the food for this evening.  She was so organized and quickly set up stations so we could all help assemble and prepare for dinner and dessert.

We called ourselves "Team Super G" and had a blue theme, of course.  Gavin looked best in blue.  We all wore blue shirts... and our Super G pins.

Except Brian - who wore his "Super G" shirt - and his awesome "Super G" Nikes.

My sister, Bean (Gavin's Godmother!) and our nephew, Brendan worked on the Brocolli Slaw...

Our brother in law, Jim, was constantly busy in the kitchen - but I caught him cutting out cards to help the guests identify what the foods were on the buffet when I snapped this...

Miss Sara and Granny worked on the desserts...

...and our nieces Claire and Shannon iced the brownie bites!

Everyone worked so hard and it all came together beautifully.

I had some anxiety going into this event.  Worried that I would become too emotional... (I didn't)... or that I would make any of the recipients or their families feel uncomfortable in any way since this was done in memory of my little boy who was a donor... (that didn't happen, either!).  None of my fears were realized and I actually had a couple really lovely conversations.  

I was so happy, too, that my family could get a tour of the Family House - including Gavin's guest room which was vacant!  The plaque outside the guest room made us feel so special.  And my family agreed that we chose the perfect room to honor Gavin.  It has a view of the Ben Franklin Bridge - which is blue and is lit up at night.  Gavin would have loved that.  It also has a view of the garden below which has hydrangeas... butterfly bushes... and trickling fountains.  Gavin would have loved that, too.  And on the same floor - just a couple doors down - is their blue "Serenity Room" which has a trickling fountain and is very zen like... perfect for our little Buddha baby.

Tonight meant so much to us.  Ed and I were so touched that everyone gave up their afternoon... devoted their time... their resources and their hearts to make this happen.  

Thank you, Team Super G!!

And to Gavin... our Superhero.  The fact that you were an organ donor makes us so proud - and brings us such comfort.  But your legacy, truly, is the way your story is touching people - and inspiring them to become organ donors.  Even encouraging them to start having conversations about organ donation before they are in the midst of a tragedy.  Maybe your kidneys saved one man's life... but what you've done since could possibly save hundreds, if not more.  I know, with all of my heart, that this had to be part of your mission on Earth.

Superhero Gavin, off to save lives... even still.  But the first lives he saved were his Mommy and Daddy's.

You will always be OUR greatest gift of life.